Sunday, July 18, 2004
Well
well well.. finally, i decided to start on this blog thing after seeing
some of my fellow frenz doing them. Nvm. What triggers me to write this
online diary is that wat happened to my 'brother' reminds me of my very
own fate. Also that recently also quite stress. Well.. i always have
this tot of quitting commando. Reason: Why make my life so difficult
since itz juz 2 yrs of ns shit.. and itz a waste of time....
However, the high pay i am drawing, the attraction of airborne and the
chance to be something different always keep me going. Recently, this
tot of quitting commando is getting stronger n stronger. Maybe itz
because i am losing confidence in myself.. Maybe itz the high
expectations of commandos i have to keep up with.. Maybe, itz the tough
trainings... Maybe, i am getting too used to good life at Nee Soon
camp.. Maybe, maybes... Also, suay things are hitting me faster than a
shark attack recently. Like being the IC of the medic platoon at the
wrong time.. Getting injuries even in SMM. Bunkmates fucking each
other.. etc.. Kinda sianz.
Haiz.. den today, go drink with my brothers cos one of them have some
problem.. Back to the place we named 'Altar', we drank there, tok cock
there, joke there n gossip there. That place reminds me of so much
memories. Painful memories to be exact. Reminded me how once a gal u
loved so much can turn out to be one of the most hateful person in ya
life. Life is full of ironies. And when my fren start to tell me his
troubles, while listening, i saw a reflection of my own wretched life.
However, at least he's much better of than me academically cos he's
studying in uni and i cant get in. My life seemed like a junk and
nothing seem smooth for me.. i used to blame god, but issit me tat made
it this way? haha.. i dunno.
wrote at**``~
